Decoding "Pride and Prejudice": Beyond the Romance

The Overlooked Nuances: Mrs. Bennet's Nerves, Charlotte's Room, and Mr. Darcy's Reticence

I recently started binge-watching "Too Much," Lena Dunham and Luis Felber's new series about an American girl moving from New York to London in search of romance. It's clearly inspired by classic English literature, and of course, it pays homage to Jane Austen's most famous opening line from "Pride and Prejudice." Twisted into a modern American version, it declares: “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single American girl in possession of a one-way ticket to London, must be in want of her own Mr. Darcy.”

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As an avid Jane Austen fan, I've re-read "Pride and Prejudice" more than 20 times since my teenage years. Back then, I was a clueless but curious girl eager to understand love and marriage. This book, through its masterful creation of the ideal man, Mr. Darcy—universally acknowledged by women across generations—accurately depicts what ideal love and marriage can be. But more profoundly, "Pride and Prejudice" gave me a fundamental education about love and marriage, revealing their truths in a very brutal yet honest way.

In this article, I want to decode what I've learned through my personal, distinctly Chinese lens, aiming to build a cultural resonance across borders when it comes to classic literature's enduring power and adaptation.

Credit: Barnes & Noble

More Than Just a Love Story

"Pride and Prejudice" is far from a simple love story between Mr. Darcy and Miss Elizabeth, as many romantic novels are. It’s a pity, yet also a testament to its power, that most people only remember and yearn for Mr. Darcy. But what truly elevates this book to classic literature and a "bible" for love and marriage is its incisive cut into the very fabric of the 19th-century British marriage market and social classes. Austen precisely captures details that compel you to probe deeper, to think more, because the fundamental aspects of marriage remain timeless. That is why it teaches me something new every time I read it. In my adolescence, I was captivated by the romantic drama and plot twists between Mr. Darcy and Miss Elizabeth, leaving the subtle but thought-provoking themes, storylines, and characters—like Mrs. Bennet's nerves, Charlotte's room, or Mr. Darcy's reticence—aside, with questions for later.

The Unsung Pragmatism of Mrs. Bennet

First, as I've grown older and gained some practical wisdom, I've developed a profound empathy for Mrs. Bennet. She's often criticized as ridiculous, vulgar, unintellectual, and a constant embarrassment to her sensible daughters in social settings. Yet, it's undeniable that she's the only one in the family confronting the harsh reality head-on: the potential impoverishment of herself and her daughters after Mr. Bennet's death. She is practical enough to shrewdly calculate her five daughters' value in the marriage market, essentially "selling" them like a savvy businesswoman. Meanwhile, her husband often acts like a neglectful father, much like many unreliable married men in China who avoid real marital problems, be it their children's education or marriage prospects. Only when you've experienced a similar type of unreliable partner can you truly understand why her complaints about her "nerves" are so frequent. In an era where women had few choices beyond marriage, she did what she believed was best for her daughters and deserves respect far more than ridicule.

Charlotte's Strategic Retreat

Beyond Mrs. Bennet, Miss Elizabeth’s best friend, Charlotte, stands out as a pragmatic yet remarkably intelligent woman. In youth, it's baffling why she accepts the proposal of the book's most absurd character, Mr. Collins. You feel betrayed and shocked, just as Miss Elizabeth does, and you question her judgment. How could they be best friends with such divergent values and intellect? Yet, as you read on, you discover Charlotte is genuinely content with her marriage; "it was all done very well." The most fascinating detail about Charlotte is how strategically she arranges her room far away from her husband, achieving peace and comfort. As Austen writes, "When Mr. Collins could be forgotten, there was a pleasure in their being all together, but at any rate, Charlotte's room, in its decent, though not large dimensions, had an air of comfort and was to her a welcome refuge from her husband's society.”

It's as if Jane Austen, with keen observation, spotlights a seemingly unimportant detail that is, in fact, incredibly telling. It offers a glimpse into a brutal truth about marriage, especially those based on economic stability and social status, or even those long-lasting unions where passion has dwindled due to trivialities. Yes, your husband can be annoying or disturbing, sometimes quite often, even for those who married for love at first sight. The best way to maintain a marriage is often to give each other space to breathe, a break within the relationship. Women have known this since the 19th century, a truth sharply observed and diligently captured by Jane Austen.

The Paradox of Mr. Darcy

Finally, I want to delve into Mr. Darcy, the quintessential ideal man. Every woman desires a Mr. Darcy, and every man aspires to become one. What makes him so charming and irresistible is Austen's meticulous portrayal of qualities that are impossible not to fall for. However, after countless re-reads and viewing various Darcys in adaptations, I've questioned: how would I truly identify Mr. Darcy in real life, given his pervasive reticence and quiet demeanor? No wonder Miss Elizabeth misunderstood him for over half the book!

Moreover, in a relationship, this reticence would present a significant challenge when a woman needs emotional support or for her partner to reveal true feelings and empathy. Miss Elizabeth might be a fitting match for Mr. Darcy because she is witty, bubbly, and always ready to initiate conversation, but not all women are like that. Therefore, the only reason Mr. Darcy is forgiven for this "flaw" is his immense wealth. Other men of similar good qualities would be at a distinct disadvantage if they were too reserved to express their feelings and thoughts to the women they desired.

I must stop here; otherwise, this piece would stretch for pages! "Pride and Prejudice" is replete with such subtle nuances that pique your interest, provoke your thoughts, and invite you to mull them over every time you read it. And with each reading, you learn and grow. Jane Austen truly was a genius with eyes as sharp as a knife, observing and never missing any detail worthwhile to make the reader pause. These details, bit by bit, reveal profound truths about love, marriage, and the society we live in, brimming with timeless wisdom and universal appeal.